MEET DENNIS SIMSEK: "MINDFULNESS MEDITATION ALLOWS PEOPLE A TIME-OUT FROM THEIR HECTIC LIVES. I

If you were to look at Dennis Simsek today, you would never guess that he was someone who lost close relationships throughout his life. In addition, you would never believe that this highly successful individual was once broke and would sleep in his Jeep due to the difficulty of paying rent. You would also be in disbelief that this calm and assertive man once contemplated, and almost carried out, a suicide attempt. But what drove Dennis to this point? How could a man, who when you look at today seems to have everything an individual would want, be driven to the point of taking his own life?

The clear-cut answer - anxiety disorder.

Anxiety disorder affects more than 40 million people in the United States, alone. And although not everyone contemplates suicide while struggling with anxiety disorder, it can have a tremendously negative effect in an individual’s daily life. But what most people are not convinced of is that anxiety disorder is a completely curable illness. Now, there will be some that will be uncomfortable using the word “cure” when it comes to the healing of anxiety disorder, but as you will see in the interview with Dennis Simsek, anxiety disorder can be completely eliminated from an individual’s life without the worry of it ever coming back.

I am positive that many of you, if you have ever battled anxiety disorder, will completely relate to the sentiments expressed by Dennis during my exclusive interview with him. In addition, you will come to know why Dennis practices Mindfulness meditation daily and how he uses it to increase inner peace and compassion in his life. So, without further ado, my interview with Dennis Simsek: friend, partner, father, and aspiring tennis professional.

Joshua: Tell me a little about your experience with anxiety and panic attacks.

Dennis: Well I can say with my whole heart now Joshua, that I have truly been through hell... and back with anxiety. I suffered through Hypochondria, panic attacks and depression for over 6 years which began in my mid 20's. I moved my fiance and my new born child to Bali during the height of my anxiety, hoping that a change in scenery would take my focus off of myself, and all my sensations of anxiety I experienced (and boy were there many sensations).

The biggest pain in my butt when it came to anxiety was my constant lump in my throat feeling, and my dizziness. I basically focused in on those two things literally, all day, everyday. I would constantly 'check-in' on those symptoms of anxiety constantly, which meant during times I was on the tennis court playing a professional tennis match, during conversations with people, during meal time, basically it was constant and showed no signs of leaving me anytime soon.

I literally convinced myself, and everyone around me that I had a serious illness, because that's what Google told me! My panic attacks led me to the emergency room on a weekly basis, if I was lucky. It was more like every 2 or 3 days. Everyone I knew back then that didn't know about my anxiety disorder must have thought I was crazy or something, because I would leave conversations while they were speaking to me to get some fresh air, to pop an Ativan, to pray (closest time I ever was to god I must say).

It was a living nightmare, and the only thing I really looked forward to were two things, alcohol, and sleep. Because those were the only two times I didn't think about my anxiety. Life sucked...

Joshua: What were your triggers, and how would your anxiety manifest?

Dennis: To be honest with you Joshua, my fight or flight response was always on, and everything was a trigger. My subconscious mind saw everything as a threat, and that was mainly due to me trying my best to avoid EVERYTHING I could during the height of my anxiety and panic attacks.

I never went out with friends, I didn't work for more than 3 hours daily, our family was so broke we had to be the food bank for food regularly, and slept in the Jeep for a few weeks because we couldn't pay our rent. I kept conversations with people to just a few sentences at most, and it was basically me against the world in my mind.

That really is no way to love life as I realize now. The worst part was that my son was in his first few years on this earth, and I still had a dream of playing high level tennis as a full time professional on the ATP tour. Life really does throw you curve balls when you want something the most, and all I really wanted to do was be an amazing fiancee, future husband, a great father, and live the dream of playing pro tennis.

Sadly my focus was constantly on myself, I mean how could it not be? This is how I thought back then. If I didn't 'check-in and keep track of all that was going on in my mind and my body, I would lose control, right? Not only control of my mind completely, but I feared death very very much. So I was basically like a watchdog on the lookout for any feelings that might send me over the edge, and towards my impending doom. But to answer your question, everything was a trigger, and life was very uncomfortable, and close minded.

Joshua: Was there a point in your battle against anxiety where you thought you would live with anxiety for the rest of your life?

Dennis: Oh most definitely. You know you hear about the suicide rates of so many people who have dealt with depression, but rarely do we hear about the ones who suffered from anxiety and panic attacks. It's a feeling that truly is hard to explain, and only people that have experienced severe health anxiety and panic attacks like myself would understand.

I cursed god, the universe, the aliens, my fiancée, everyone and everything for what I was going through. No one had an answer for it, no doctor, no therapist, no naturopath, no one. This is what drove me to find answers online, and join the coping forums that were scattered on the web. Everywhere I turned the answers were to keep coping with it, deal with it, and no one showed me why I was experiencing what I was, and what I must do to make a complete 180.

Joshua: What did you do to alleviate your anxiety symptoms?

Dennis: Well I tried everything from popular online programs, to every medication there was, to therapy, everything. Each and every 'answer' I tired left out a very basic need I needed. A tool, the real answer I was searching for deep down that would get me on the road to recovery, and once and for all turn what was then a monster, into a fly.

The answer I was looking for was confidence, and proper knowledge from someone who was once in my shoes. Most therapists only know what they've studied about anxiety and panic, and most of the time have never felt the horror of being in our shoes. Doctors also are quick to get you to jump on the billion dollar medication industry bandwagon, and upping my dose every 2 weeks just made me slur my words more.

I needed guidance from someone who was in my shoes, someone who came through that hell, someone who could not only give me hope, but could share the information I needed to hear. This is what I needed. I sent an email to a fellow professional athlete who went through the same thing as I was, and overcame his condition naturally (he wanted his name to be confidential so I'll just call him Steve). Steve wasn't an anxiety book-worm, but he knew what worked and what didn't. Steve showed me things that were right in front of my face, habits that I was taking part in that were feeding my fears and beliefs further. You could say, he didn't show me what TO do, as much as he showed me what NOT to continue doing in my life that was adding to my anxiety.

It was mostly a combination of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and a systematic desensitization process that was easy to follow in time, that led to my full recovery from anxiety disorders, and I owe him my life for opening my eyes to the new possibilities I now have in my life.

Joshua: Have you ever heard of Mindfulness meditation, and if so, how do you feel it helps with anxiety?

Dennis: Mindfulness meditation is a tricky thing, and I don't recommend it to people with more severe cases of anxiety. Reason being, people who experience Hypochondria and severe health anxiety are already so caught up in themselves. Their feelings, their thoughts. The last thing that these people need is more failure, and that is exactly what mindfulness meditation does to people who are deeply sensitized.

The idea of being silent, to focus on the breathing rhythm is something that these people fear, so I have a real problem pushing people into their fears like that. At the more mild to moderate stages, sure. Mindfulness meditation is good. It allows people a time-out from their hectic lives. A chance to listen to their higher-selves, and to get answers to some of their questions about spirituality, their future etc. I currently practice mindfulness meditation on a daily basis, and I love it. It truly can be a weapon that works wonders for most people out there who doubt themselves, and the world around them.

Joshua: I learned that you’ve put together a program that helps individuals suppress their anxious symptoms, where can an individual find you to receive your help?

Dennis: The End The Anxiety Program is a CBT based program that took me just over 2 years to put together. It was mainly put together due to my anger I had for why things weren't changing in anxious minded peoples lives. I had to be that answer, I had to give these people hope, and finally, I had to share what worked for me with them. I get thank you messages almost by the minute on some days, and this is mainly due to the 'checking in' system I have in place for people who go through the program.

The checking-in system is a process in which one of our 6 instructors (who have all gone through the program themselves, and have overcome their chronic anxiety related to health naturally), is like a big brother or sister to the person currently going through the program. On every third day the sufferer gets in contact with the instructor, and the instructor provides the necessary feedback to the person going through the program. This feedback could be in the form of a Skype chat, an email, anything. It could be an inspirational 'pick me up' type message, or it could be an answer to some of the questions they may have at that time. This is the key that keeps sufferers from giving up due to a setback, they begin to understand that this isn't a sprint to the finish line, but instead a long distance run. This process of the proper knowledge, and the right support molds these sufferers into true warriors.

They quickly realize that their battle with themselves was a test all along, not a punishment. Many anxiety sufferers go on to live the life they truly want to live, far from the life of hell they once lived. For anyone looking for more information on the End The Anxiety Program they can find it under the menu item labeled 'my program' at http://www.anxietykey.com. I also provide 1 on 1 coaching through http://lifeanxietycoach.com.

Joshua: In your viewpoint, do you believe you have cured your anxiety? Why or Why not?

Dennis: Yes I have overcome my anxiety disorder completely after suffering for more than 6 years. I know this because of the results I have seen in my life. I know this because my focus has turned away from me, my symptoms, and my fear of death, to the incredible blessings I've been able to enjoy recently. I've become an ATP ranked tennis professional, I have the privilege of being able to share my story and do talks and retreats to help others around the world who are suffering from health anxiety, and I experience incredible joy being with my family each and every day I live.

Once the hidden goals and dreams for your life manifest into your reality, you truly have learned to turn the anxiety monster into a fly. Because let's first understand what we are, we are limitless. I now see it to be a SIN not to live abundantly, not to chase your goals and dreams in your life. Nothing not even severe anxiety should keep us from feeling how we want to and doing what we want in our lives. That's why my goal is to put all the anxiety coping websites, the scams, the 'professionals' that are more money minded all out of business in the future, and open up a whole new outlook. Experienced people, helping people, this is the way it should be.

Joshua: What activities were able to do before your anxiety, and what activities, or situations, were difficult for you during your anxiety?

Dennis: Wow great question. I basically see my life in three parts:Before, during, and after anxiety. Before anxiety I was an outgoing guy, a complete sports jock who loved to be around people that were positive, successful, joyful and just loved life. I traveled the world as a tennis pro since the tender age of 7 years old, and traveling really gave me the street smarts I needed at a later age. During my anxiety I never went on dates with girls, I would get to bed at about 7 pm each night with the hopes of feeling less sensitized the day before.

I can tell you from experience, hope alone gets you know where fast with anxiety. You just dig yourself a bigger hole as the days go by. Thankfully I was at a house party one night, alone, and it was actually a small miracle that the person throwing the house party got me to attend that night. That's where I met my fiancee Robyn. I was extremely intoxicated and somehow, the universe that night helped me conjure up the braveness to go up and say a few words to her. Luckily I met my soul mate that night, and we've been happy ever since. I truly believe that the immediate support group of people suffering from anxiety, like a fiancee, a wife, husband etc have to be given incredible credit. These people do everything they can to understand, to comfort, and find answers for the sufferer. But can do very little if they themselves have never been in the same anxious shoes.

One activity I remember doing was to memorize the names of the nurses, doctors and regular patients at the local hospital I visited regularly due to my overwhelming panic attacks. No joke. After all the hyperventilating stopped, and the dizziness was manageable, I wrote down all the names of all the folks that were around me, and guessed their names the next time I was there. Fun, right?

Joshua: As an individual who has dealt with, and understands, the cycle of anxiety do you feel that there is a permanent cure for anxiety disorder?

Dennis: Yes, and that permanent cure lies within the people strong enough to systematically face their fears, and can inspire and guide others to do the same. Coping techniques are not enough when it comes to anxiety disorders, emotions must be present. Real, intense emotions. I remember at the later stages of my anxiety disorder screaming at my anxiety to do it's worst as I drove down the freeway at 140 kph.

In the end it's all a game, a very painful and grueling one of course, But a game nonetheless. The way to win that game is to first accept that what you have is related to anxiety, and not a physical ailment. You must become knowledgeable about why you are experiencing what you are, you must also build on facts that support your new beliefs, and take regular action towards changing your feared programming, that means your thoughts and actions in your outside world. You must also understand the power of patience, and accept setbacks because they are inevitable. These are excellent guidelines to understand and a great starting point for anyone suffering today.

Joshua: Give me one tip you would suggest to someone who came to you at this moment to manage their anxiety symptoms.

Dennis: The one tip I would give to someone is to take a good look at how you are feeding your anxiety levels throughout your day. Do you go to sleep right after being on Facebook and going through all that stimuli? Do you regularly visit forums and chats online that keep you in a cycle of coping with anxiety? Do you visit a new doctor to do a new test due to a symptom that has shown up? Do you regularly search Dr. Google to find out what your symptoms might mean? Do you speed through life and do EVERYTHING at lightning speed which includes how you eat, drive, talk etc?

There must have been about 15 things I did that kept my anxiety levels high that at the time I didn't recognize. Things that at the time you might think are helping you, keeping you in control, but in fact are hurting your efforts to end your anxiety naturally. Go deep, write those things down, and take note of all those things that are regular habits, thoughts that are feeding your high levels of anxiety. Remember, what you stop doing, could be just as important as what you start doing. Once you begin to see a change in your thoughts, your actions etc., you build confidence. With confidence and proper guidance comes complete desensitization from your fears.

As you can see from Dennis’ sentiments overcoming anxiety disorder is not only possible but is within the grasp of anyone who decides to end their suffering. All you have to do is the work and the process for relief naturally occurs. In addition, Dennis provides some keen insight into the practice of Mindfulness meditation and how it can provide relief from anxiety disorder and have a positive impact in daily life. It was a privilege to interview Dennis. It is a desire of mine that people who are battling anxiety disorder find hope and confidence from Dennis’ story. Essential for Life sends its well-wishes to Dennis and wishes him the best in all of his future endeavors.

Find out what Dennis is up to today by visiting his website @:

Dennis Simsek/The Anxiety Guy

http://www.anxietykey.com